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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23217964">Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tomboy13/pseuds/Tomboy13'>Tomboy13</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Wynonna Earp (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, Fluff, Podfic Available</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 10:48:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,222</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23217964</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tomboy13/pseuds/Tomboy13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Nicole loves that Waverly has fun with her friends, but when the Earp announces a margarita night, all Nicole can think is <i>Oh have mercy...</i><br/>—————————<br/>Update: there’s now a podfic available of this story, thanks to our lovely friends at AudioFrickBooks:</p>
<p><strong>Podfic Availability:</strong> <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26751586">[Podfic] Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off</a></p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Waverly Earp/Nicole Haught</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>131</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Times feel hard right now team, so thought I’d treat myself to a quick detour to write some silly fluff, based on Joe Nichol’s country hit “Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off.”</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Oh, baby, I forgot to mention - I’m out with the girls tonight. It’s Margarita night at the Holiday Inn.”</p>
<p><i>Oh have mercy,</i> Nicole thought.</p>
<p>“That’ll be fun babe.” She said into the phone, her voice pointedly neutral. “Who else is going?”</p>
<p>“‘Nonna, Chrissy, Rosita, Robin and Jeremy. Mercedes might pop in. You know, the usual crew.”</p>
<p>“Sounds great. I’m sorry I can’t be there.” Nicole glanced round the deserted station; they tried to rotate their Friday night shifts, but with such a small staff, she was on more weekends than she was off. “Just...make sure to put some extra layers on. It’s meant to be cold tonight.”</p>
<p>“Don’t be silly, Nic, we’ll be inside.” Waverly giggled. “Besides, DJ Dave is going to be there, and you know I can’t resist his mix of classic rock and Latin beats, I’ll be sweatin’ like a roastin’ pig at the county fair.”</p>
<p>Nicole chuckled, remembering the last time Purgatory’s premiere (and only) Disc Jockey had played an event frequented by the Earps. Wynonna had all but forced the man at gun point to play back-to-back Guns N Roses for 7 songs straight before security had forcibly escorted her away. The video was still saved in Nicole’s ‘Favourites’; she was trying to work out how to turn it into a GIF. “Ok babe, well can you at least take a shawl or something, just in case? And make sure the boys look after you. Or Chrissy.” <i>Anyone but your sister</i>, she tactfully didn’t say.</p>
<p>“Ok, worry pants, I will. Love you!” Waverly trilled.</p>
<p>“Love you too.” Nicole answered, shaking her head as she hung up.</p>
<p>Nicole Haught wasn’t a jealous woman. She knew how much Waverly cared for her, and she trusted the younger woman implicitly. That Waverly was amassing a group of loyal friends that she could call on for both emotional support and much-needed fun was, to Nicole, a glorious outcome of the newly acquired self confidence that had only started truly blossoming when Wynonna swaggered back into town. She loved that the younger Earp could go for Prosecco brunches with Robin and Jeremy, or to vodka soaked nights with Mercedes and Wynonna when the rip-off chippendales came to town (ok, maybe she was less thrilled about that one, but she kept her reservations to herself).</p>
<p>No, her nervousness about Waverly’s evening out had nothing to do with mistrust. It was just that although the woman could handle any amount of rum punch or bourbon shooters, the second tequila got involved, she had a hard time keeping her clothes on.</p>
<p>It would start with something silly: her high heels would be kicked off under the table, or she’d lose an earring in someone’s drink. Then the bigger stuff would go: a jacket left in the ladies toilets, or a cardigan abandoned on the bar; purses haphazardly left in taxis and jewellery thrown across a dance floor.</p>
<p>Nicole remembered fondly Randy Nedley’s 65th birthday, when Waverly had indulged in a few too many tequila slammers and ended up on the pool table swinging her brassiere around her head. No-one could even work out how she’d gotten it off, her long sleeved sheath dress not made for easy access, but it had been a picture. Nicole had coaxed her down, while Doc had brow beaten the gathering crowd of on-lookers into turning respectfully away, and Wynonna had laughed so hard she’d wet her pants. Waverly had sworn off Patrón after that, and for months had gone green whenever she saw lemons.</p>
<p>Nicole found it adorable. There was something so very Waverly in it, in the sheer exuberant joy that made her forget, in the haze of the moment, about things like <i>propriety</i> and <i>decorum</i>, and, on a few occasions, why she’d worn pantyhose.</p>
<p>“You fell in love with a firecracker, Haught, no mistake there.” The Officer sighed dreamily, dragging another load of paperwork across the desk, pen at the ready.</p>
<p>————————————————-————-</p>
<p>The light was like a chainsaw.</p>
<p>Groaning, Waverly Earp pulled the duvet over her head. Without opening her eyes, she sniffed deeply, recognising the overtly floral scent of Nicole’s washing powder. She relaxed some of the tension in her shoulders, the feeling of familiar safety wrapping around her like a second blanket. Then she took stock.</p>
<p>She was basically naked, stripped bare but for a lacy pair of knickers. Stretching out one leg then the other and flexing both arms, she assessed that she was in one piece. Her memories were a bit of a blur; she remembered the first couple of margaritas, and a tequila paf being pushed into her hand. She remembered Jon Bon Jovi. Her eyes widened. “Oh what have I <i>done</i>?”</p>
<p>“Morning, drunko.” Nicole whispered, leaning over to press a kiss to her girlfriend’s ear. “There’s some water and tablets on the bedside table. How are you feeling?”</p>
<p>Slowly, Waverly turned in the bed, a look of horror on her face. Nicole smiled sympathetically. “Baby, I got up on stage. I sang.”</p>
<p>“To ‘It’s My Life’.” Nicole scrunched her face up. “Chrissy showed me the video.”</p>
<p>“Oh god there’s a <i>video</i>!” Waverly sobbed, slumping back into the pillow. </p>
<p>“You ripped-“</p>
<p>Waverly covered her face with both hands. “I ripped my tights off like The Full Monty.”</p>
<p>“You did.” Nicole suppressed a laugh. “But at least you kept your dress on for that part.”</p>
<p>Waverly moved her hands and narrowed her eyes suspiciously. “What do you mean ‘for that part’?”</p>
<p>“Well when I came to pick you guys up - thanks for that by the way, totally not what a police car is for - you may have been without the clothes you went out in.”</p>
<p>“I was naked?” Waverly hissed.</p>
<p>“You were wearing a table cloth.” Nicole couldn’t hold it back then, a toothy grin breaking across her face. “Apparently you spilled red wine down your dress, so you dragged Rosita to the bathroom and when you got back - you were wearing the table cloth like a toga.”</p>
<p>“Oh goooooddddd.” Waverly moaned, giggles bursting forth in spite of her nausea. They mixed with Nicole’s guffaws as the couple rolled together, legs tangling and arms wrapping tightly around each other’s warm bodies in the cocoon of Nicole’s double bed.</p>
<p>“You’re incorrigible, Waverly Earp.” Nicole smiled as the laughter subsided. </p>
<p>“But you love me anyway?” Waverly asked sweetly, tickling the wispy hairs at the back of her partner’s neck, putting on her best puppy dog eyes.</p>
<p>Nicole pulled the brunette incrementally closer with gentle hands, until their faces were a hairs width apart. “I love you, there’s no ‘anyway’ about it.”</p>
<p>They kissed, soft and tender and lovely, enjoying each other’s closeness and the sanctuary It brought, until Nicole pulled back, her nose wrinkling. “But you have <i>got</i> to brush your teeth, you taste like a brewery.”</p>
<p>Waverly huffed mournfully, her hangover reeling up like a viper ready to strike. “Fine, but pancakes?”</p>
<p>“Teeth, then pancakes.” Nicole rolled her eyes, kissing the woman’s nose. “You’ll need them for the absolute ribbing your friends are going to give you, you little drunken monkey.”</p>
<p>Shutting the door, Nicole stifled another laugh at the long, pendulous groan that rushed from her love’s mouth. </p>
<p><i>Have mercy,</i> she thought, going to dig out the frying pan. <i>That girl will be the death of me, and I don’t mind a bit.</i></p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Take care, be kind to each other and yourselves, and try to enjoy the little things.</p></blockquote><div class="children module" id="children">
  <b class="heading">Works inspired by this one:</b>
  <ul>
    <li>
        <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26751586">[Podfic] Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off</a> by <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/AudioFrickBooks/pseuds/AudioFrickBooks">AudioFrickBooks</a>
    </li>
  </ul>
</div></div></div>
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